Girl: Oh no, my internet isn't working!
Guy 1: You might need a bigger wireless card. Maybe an external card or something.
Guy 2: You could get one of those radial antennas and sit there in class holding it up above your head like this. Ha. Haha.
Girl and Guy 1: (silent stares)
180 Dennison
Guy 1: I just can't get enough of this book!
Guy 2: You know what I can't get enough of? My mom's pancakes.
Guy 1: Is your mom here?
Guy 2: Nope.
Gamer #1: Dude, I was playing this game with some Asians this morning. Asians from Asia. It was sweet because they were actually speaking asian!
~South Quad
Random Football Player: Man, so me and Stevie J went to this girls room - man she had some biiiig ass titties! Started foolin around with her right there... so I just wanted to see how far she would let me go, and we ended up tying her up to the futon by her scarf. She reached over and tried to grab my cell phone, and BAM, whap-whap, her titties fell out of her shirt and smacked her in the face.
- Bursley/Baits Bus, as always.
Guy : Dude, give me the damn package... ohh sweet its my free condom!
Girl: Haha, what the hell are you gonna do with a Magnum?
Guy : I'll cut that bitch in half and use it twice.
- Bursley Hall, outside the mailboxes
Guy: Dude, guys, I was studying with this one chick today and she actually used the word lexicon in context. I was like, "Oh my God! I know that adverb!"
~South Quad
Chick with HEAVY East Coast lispy accent: “I bought a membership to Bally’s because I got tired of walking to the CCRB. Now I can just drive in my car to go work out.”
overheard by brandon
Guy 1: Dude, you didn't have to pee in the bottle.
Guy 2: Yes I did man, it was necessary
Guy 1: You could've made it to the bathroom.
Guy 2: I couldn't because of all the duct tape, remember?
- Bursley/Baits Bus
Girl 1: The African American Barbie had green and blue eyes.
Girl 2: Isn't that like genetically impossible?
Girl 1: Yeah! That's what I'm saying.
overheard by kevin.
girls looking at underwear:
Sorostitute #1: "These make you look really skinny."
Sorostitute #2: "Oh, like when you're naked?"
overheard by amanda.
Girl 1: There are a lot of words that I don't know.
Girl 2: Yeah, me too. That's why I don't read...too much vocabulary.
Lydia Mendelssohn Theatre
Girl 1: "We're going to France over break!"
Girl 2: "Oh! You're such a bitch!"
Girl 1: "I know. I am a bitch."
I'm going to have a trachea fetish after this project. Hey, you. You have a nice trachea there.
~Basement of the UGLi
"Yeah, but I never plan on selling out or anything. I see myself more of a Ben Folds or something."
~Man on Cell Phone in Diag
--Overheard by Abe
Girl: This is REALLY good wine…. It’s from
Guy: let me try it.. it tastes kinda fruity.
Girl: Well there was orange pop in here before the wine.
Girl 1: Yeah, I think my mom has called me every single day for the past month or so. Starting to get annoying.
Girl 2: Haha yeah, that's why I don't have parents.
Girl 1: .....
Girl 1: Wow, do you think the leather on this couch is real or fake?
Girl 2: It looks real, although they probably dyed it blue...
Girl 1: Yeah, they probably did. I've never heard of blue cows.
-Michigan Union, 1st Floor
guy 1: there's express men.
guy 2: is that the gay store you were telling me about?
two men walk out of store pushing a stroller together
guy 1: yes, yes it is.
